Wednesday, August 06, 2008

The only time I went to a Psychiatrist.

When I was a young teen (12 or 13 years old), my mother and my beloved uncle decided it was to my best interest that I get psychiatric help because I was "gay like". At that time I was not very self aware of my sexuality. I did not have any sexual attractions to male or female but I do remember admiring some men and imagining how it would be if they were my father. You see my parents were separated when I was 4 and I mainly grew up with my mom sort of "fatherless". Also I was not what you considered a "normal" boy growing up. I like to play with my cousin's barbie dolls and I was not interested with boy games. So my mother and my uncle had valid concern that I will turn out gay hence the trip to the Psychiatrist. I do not remember much what the Doctor talked to me about. It was more like counseling and it was not an unpleasant experience. But it obviously did not help cause I am still gay. In fact due to empirical data, the American Psychiatric Association removed homosexuality from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) in 1973. My own experience with Psychiatry enforced my belief that homosexuality is not a mental disease and can not be cured by any form of psycho therapy or it's variant. If it was, then I should call in sick everyday cause I am gay everyday and have this disease!

On a related story, my older cousin who was also "gay-like" was also sent to the same psychiatrist that time. He is now married to a woman and a father. So he was in all intent and purposes "cured" from homosexuality. hhmmmmm..... I could also be married to a woman and father a child if I want to. But does it mean I am heterosexual??? Not! I am not saying my cousin is a closeted gay man leading a heterosexual lifestyle. I am just pointing out that being married and fathering a child does not make you a heterosexual. You are what you are regardless of how you act on it.

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