Not too saddened by death of people I knew

When my father passed away many years ago, I did not feel much sadness or lost. After all, I hardly saw my dad growing up. And when he passed, I was already working here in the States and I have not seen him or even communicated with him for several years already. So my life continued as it was and I did not miss anything brought on by his passing. Did I love my father? I probably did not but I did respect him and I owed him gratitude for providing for me. He was not a dead beat dad but he was hardly a dad in the true sense of the father-son relationship. So nothing changed when he passed away.

In the past recent years, one of my friend got sick and his prognosis lately got worse. He told me that his doctor gave him 6-12 months to live. As I ponder this information, I did not feel tremendously saddened by it. I mean I was sad that he is getting sicker but I did not think it was going to affect me much. After all, we have not been as good as a friend as we were some years ago. We hardly saw each other or talk to each other lately owing to his other priorities. So I thought my life would go on as it was the past year or two. I do not think I will miss his absence. I do not know for sure to be honest.

So am I a heartless person for not feeling very sad from a lost of a father or the impending lost of a friend? Or am I just too pragmatic that it somewhat overwhelms my personality. Don't get me wrong. My father's death or my friend's impending death does not give me joy but I am not too saddened by it either. I like to think that my feelings are not too extraordinarily pathological in a psychological way. It is just the way I feel.