Same patterns from LA gay men

I have said it many times to my deceased friend Sam before.  If a guy is not sure about you, he will have excuses that he is not looking for a relationship or that he is not ready or he just wants to be friends.  The moment the right guy for him comes along, he will be ready and those excuses will be thrown out the door.

Not that I really think LA gay men will be different, my recent experiences with LA gay men just reinforced what I have observed for the past years about gay men.

Take Joe from the phone app Jack'd.  We chatted and flirted but he told me that he is not looking for dating since he just got out of an ugly relationship.  Sounds reasonable?  Yes indeed.  Then he disappeared for 3 weeks and when I saw him again online and resumed chatting, he told me that just has started seeing someone so he can't meet anymore.  Obviously, I was not exactly what he was looking for cause he made an excuse of just looking for casual NSA encounter and not dating.  I get it so I move on.

Then there is Adam from Adam4Adam.  When we chatted and eventually met, I was not really into him.  But he was persistent with me and eventually he grew on me.  He would text me often and would even ask me why I don't initiate texting him.  We were flirty to each other.  He would even jokingly get jealous asking if I was on a date when I was not able to answer his call.  I started to like him and we hang out more often.  I thought we were beginning to date but he told me one time that he just wants to be friends.  Perhaps he later changed his mind but it was evident that I was not what he was looking for.  So he made an excuse that he might leave the country soon.  I did not buy it of course.  It was simple for me, he was not really that into me.  So I just told him that we can not see each other anymore.  I am moving on and he is just a baggage that would slow me down.

When the "right" guy comes along, gay men will make it work regardless of the obstacle.  Plain and simple.