Wednesday, January 27, 2010

He who hates me.

I work with this guy who seems to hate me. How do I know this? Well he does not really talk to me. Our conversation is mostly civil and work related but with other folks, he is very talkative and friendly. He was the only one to complain that I used the Thera tube as decoration for the Christmas tree when in fact there are plenty left for him to use on patients and the Thera tubes can still be used for patient care after I take it down from the tree. He was the only one to complain that I failed to return the overhead pulley on their side of the department. I always return it back but sometimes I get too busy with patients that I get delayed in doing it. Also he often borrows my ES machine and does not return it to my side of the department but hears nothing from me about it. He seems out to find fault with me.

One time my patient who I scheduled with him, arrived early and I happen to be available. He was upstairs doing another patient so I could not ask him if I could see this patient for him. He did not have a beeper/pager with him so we could not page him about it. So I asked the senior therapist if I should see the patient and she said to go ahead. Upon his arrival, he was furious at me for taking the patient but said nothing to the senior therapist for approving the action. Even after I explained that we could not get a hold of him at that time. His anger was disproportionate to the deed done. It was not as if harm was done to the patient or he really liked working with this patient because he has never seen this patient before. In fact my actions benefited the patient more because this was my patient to begin with and consistency with therapist is a good thing. He was still indignant when I offered to give him the productivity units for this patient and when I gave him some peace offering snack.

I am not sure why this guy detests me. Perhaps my self confidence and know how appears to be arrogance for him? Does my being gay have anything to do with it? Does my campaign to improve our patient scheduling irks him? I really don’t know why. But the more important question is what to do with this guy. Should I just ignore him and fight fire with fire? Or should I treat him with excessive kindness to win him over? The first option would be consistent to my character but the second option seems something that I should try. Hmmm…

3 comments:

Cecilia said...

Do what makes you feel comfortable.

Here's what I think: stop trying to win him over. That's just the nature of the workplace...heck, even life. You can't please everyone.

I suggest you tell a higher-up first, bring the matter to their attention. Then speak to the guy.

If his behavior gets in the way of you or him providing quality patient care, then I say let the higher-ups know. If you feel he's discriminating against you by virtue of your sexual orientation, then it's best that it gets officially on record.

Jon said...

good to get your point of view and input on this. at this time, what he do is so petty and it does not warrant a talk to the supervisor or him. i have thought about having a dialog with him and the supervisor but i let it sink in for a bit and thought it best to not. also, i have no proof that he does not like me cause i am gay. just at feeling that it could be a factor cause with the other co-filipino straight folks, he is pretty lively and friendly. i just need to do my job well and if i have something concrete, i will act accordingly.

Lani said...

Ignoring him is not exactly fighting fire with fire. I say you carry on being yourself. If he doesn't like you, so what? Why should you try to win him over or stoop down to his level by being mean? We can't all be liked by everyone, same way we don't like everybody. If your job performance or patient care is being adversely affected, then go to your supervisor.